Sorry for not writing an article last week. I was so excited to be back from the international break that I ate way too many packets of Skittles, started bouncing off the walls and then fell asleep for five days. When I awoke, I was excited to see that my team scored 32 points, my highest of the season! Proof:
The international break was two weeks long, so we had two free transfers to use. I didn’t use either so they roll over to this week, giving me three transfers to improve my team.
First, a confession. Anyone can make a mistake in FPL, even a professional like me. It turns out that Louis Suarez didn’t score any points this season because he was banned from playing for being racist against Brainslave Ivanovic. I’m transferring him out and bringing in Ben Techie instead. The Aston Villa striker knows where the goal is. In fact, he knows where both goals are because there’s one at each end of the pitch.
Ricky Van Wolfwinkler has turned out to be a damn squid. I have to get rid of him from my team before he brings down the confidence of the other lads. In his place, I’m transferring in Suarez from Liverpool. He’s back from his ban shortly and will be a great differential. As an added bonus, his price has dropped to 10.9m. Bargain!
Gareth Bale has left the Tottenhams and signed for Spain. I’ve taken him out and brought in John Joe Shelvey. I had to call my mate for advice on Shelvey because I’ve never seen him play. The telephone signal wasn’t great but I think my mate said he was involved in 4 goals against Liverpool last week and that he played a blinder. Or was it that he played like a blind man? I don’t know. Anyway, Bale out, Shelvey in. Here’s my team for gameweek 5.
I really need to improve my defence. I thought Paul McShane would be a great player for my team but he hasn’t played a minute of football this season because he left the sport to join a band called Hot Chips.
Good luck everyone for GW5. If you have any questions, leave a comment or tweet me @FPLhelper.